Why the Distance?
My husband primarily lives and works in Oklahoma, while I’m permanently here in Dallas. We see each other for a day a few times a month, and then usually for four to six days every fifth week. It’s definitely not what I imagined would happen when I was married before I met Ben, and it’s not going to stay this way forever. But a long distance marriage is what we’re doing now, and for the foreseeable future.
None of this is a complaint – what with all of the layoffs in the oilfield, we are both thrilled and thankful that Ben still has his job. In an economy when most of the people my age are still ten years from buying a home, we’re able to save up a down payment or a safety net if one of us loses our jobs. But there also isn’t a single minute out of any day that I don’t wish he had a normal job in Dallas.
Unlike many oilfield positions, Ben doesn’t have a schedule. There’s no 14 days on, 14 days off for us. That makes it very hard to plan, and it made the ability to work remotely when necessary a priority when I was searching for a job. When he has those rare days at home, I don’t want to lose out on eight precious hours at work. Even though we’re just sitting on the couch together – me working and him playing a video game – just being in the same room as the other is incredibly important.
Every day, I want him home because he’s my husband and I love him. And I know he wants to be home. And that’s how we keep it together.